Monday, July 21, 2014

On What Little I Know

     This will sound odd (although perhaps not unexpected if you know me well) but I have no desire to live a normal life.  You read that right...I have absolutely no desire to exist in normalcy.  Average to me signifies not special enough to be noted.  Take a moment and let that thought sink in.

     Do you ever wonder...if the Bible was being written today would your life story be worthy of being written on the pages?  Does the light of Christ or our Heavenly Father shine through you in such a way that it could be penned on the same pages next to the life of David or Solomon or Ruth?  I know I ponder strange and often radical things from time to time, so perhaps I am alone in this wonderment.  But there are moments when I pause and consider...is there anything epic in my life that can be a testament to those who come after me?  I am confident that question will only be answered in full when I finally stand before my creator, to make account of my time on this earth.

     Having this question floating about in my mind for quite some time I ultimately settled it with the tiny portion of control I do have over my story.  I realized,  If I were to be remembered how would it be done in full if I were not willing to put pen to paper myself.  If indeed, your life is the novel you write, shouldn't I be writing something?  That is when I began the journey of this blog.  With the sole purpose of sharing with the world the deepest parts of my heart.  The questions that seem to silly to actually verbalize, the lessons that are so difficult to learn and the blessings...the sweet blessings given so freely to me every day.

     This my friends is it, collectively on these digital pages are housed the words that form the essence of who I am, the bible of my life.  Calm down person in the back hyperventilating,  I'm not saying that I am my own bible...don't take this so very literally.  What I'm saying is, If anything worthy of giving spiritual inspiration to another person ever came from The Lord through me it is most likely housed here in the place where I pour the contents of my heart.  Perhaps nothing beneficial is gained, and it's all poetry to me.  I'm good with that too.  But let's leave that discussion for now and move on to a fact.

The Almighty God who formed the heavens and the earth.  The God of Abraham, Issac and Jacob.  The only king to whom my soul owes it's allegiance...He is a God of miracles. That's right folks, straight up scientifically impossible, no way to reasonably explain them miracles.  Don't buy it?  Read on my friend...

     Last month my nieces and I planned to take a quick weekend trip to San Diego.  It's close enough for us to make a weekend trip and, although money is as tight for us as for most I had a great desire to make the memories with 'my girls' while they are with me and I have the opportunity to.  I have a dear friend who has dealt with significant health issues for years (multiple surgeries in a 5year span and Dr's have told her she has to adjust to only being able to do light walking for exercise because her knees just won't support her any more) and due to medical bills with a family of five money is tight for them as well.  Since the hotel and gas were already paid for I asked if she and her daughter didn't want to tag along with us.  There was some hesitation due to the extra expense of going and paying for food while there, but when we found out my bff would be joining us as well the decision was made to plan smart and spare expenses to make things work just to enjoy one anther's company.  Little did I know at the time we were about to receive some amazing miracles.  

Miracle #1

     The day before we were set to leave I was praying about the expenses and planning to make sure things would be okay when I decided to check the amount of my paycheck due to come in.  I sat in shock as I saw an additional amount of money coming in.  My supervisor confirmed that it was a bonus check.  I have been employed at my current location for nine years...this is the first ever bonus check I have received in that whole time.  It came in exactly on the paycheck of this particular trip and it was enough to cover the entire trip including my friend and her daughter. 

Miracle #2

     On Sunday morning, our last day there, both of my nieces and my bff woke up early with me and drove to a small beach along the coast.  We wanted to enjoy the sand and surf in the quiet of morning one last time before leaving.  We walked along the beach for about twenty minutes or so, wandering into the waves to look for seashells then back onto the sand to look at rocks and enjoy the beauty of the shoreline.  After realizing it was beginning to get late we turned and followed our tracks back to my car where I realized my wallet was missing from my jacket.  My wallet contained the keys to the car, my debit card, all of my cash and my driver licence.  Essentially everything needed to get us home or even back to the hotel.

     I immediately felt my pulse rise as I attempted to fight back terror and the rapidly rising wave of questions crashing in my brain.  Where could it be?  Did someone already find it and steal it?  Could it be by that one rock outcropping?  Oh Dear God...what if it fell in the waves and was washed out to sea?  What can I do?  There's nothing I can do, I can't even get us back to the hotel without that wallet!!  As we retraced our steps in and out of the waves my hope of finding the wallet seemed to be washing out with the tide.  I tried to think about where I could even start if we didn't find the wallet.  What was the first thing I needed to do and how could I remain calm to keep everyone else calm?  I reached the turnaround point with no wallet in sight and felt my heart starting to crack into a million pieces.  On the way back toward the parking lot I stopped looking entirely.  My eyes drifted to the skyline as I prayed to my Heavenly Father.  "Dear Lord,  I believe that you knew where Jonah was inside that whale in the very midst of the sea.  I know that you know where everything is on this earth you created.  I believe you can bring this wallet back to me.  I don't know what to do or where to start without it and I know you can figure it out, but I am asking now for a miracle from you.  Please Lord, if the wallet fell into the water wash it back onto shore right in front of us; if it fell in the sand and someone picked it up help them to be an honest and caring person who will be able to get it back to us somehow; if you have to Lord I know you can even make it appear right now in the sand in front of me.  However you choose to do it Lord.  Please bring it back to me in tact."

     I finished my prayer and focused on controlling my breathing and making a plan for what to do if I got back to the car without the wallet when I heard my bff's voice yell, "Laura I found it!"  I looked up to find a woman walking toward us holding the wallet in her hand.  She said she had found it and had been walking the beach looking for someone who looked like me because she knew whoever it belonged to would need it back.  As I thanked her through my tears we each went our separate ways.  As we turned my bff told me she wasn't even sure how she had seen the woman.  She randomly looked up as the woman passed and even though she didn't have her contacts in and shouldn't have been able to see anything at that distance she immediately recognized the picture on my driver license and went over to the woman. 

Miracle #3

     When we returned to the hotel room I walked into the bedroom and knew immediately something was wrong with my friend.  She was lying in bed with a look of pain painted across her face.  I was worried the effort walking the beach the day before was too much for her knees or back and asked what was hurting.  She informed me she had woken up feeling ill and could not get up without feeling like she was going to pass out or throw up.  She was afraid she had contracted some type of stomach flu.  It was our last day in San Diego and even if we skipped fun activities to head straight home it meant several hours riding up mountain roads with a sick stomach. She asked us to all pray with her that she would feel better.  I specifically prayed that if this were a stomach bug she would be able to throw up and get everything out of her system and start feeling better.  I will not go into the gory details but let me say this...our prayers were answered SPECIFICALLY and she was able to enjoy the last afternoon at the ocean and travel home without any bad effects at all.

Miracle #4

     My dear friend who traveled with us has been going through a difficult physical struggle for several years.  She has been told by doctors that it is time to adjust her lifestyle to account for the fact that she will never be able to do strenuous physical activity again.  Here's the thing though, she firmly believes that she is the daughter of a God of miracles and she has put her trust in Him to help her through this process.  She has a personal testimony of a promise that she will have a full recovery, and while it is a long and difficult process for her she has not given up hope in that promise and continues to push the limits imposed on her by the medical practice at large.

     We had stopped at these huge sand dunes on the way home, to take a rest and allow the girls to run off some steam.  It was exactly at sunset and the sky was glorious so I told my friend I wanted to climb up the first dune just to get some pictures and then I would come join her.  (she has not been able to do any kind of hiking in five years)  She said that was fine and she was planning on going as far as possible before she tired out then she would wait there.  I climbed up the dune and paused half way to take a photo of how far she had gotten.  When I reached the top I was shocked to turn and see she was about half way up the dune.  I hollered down encouragement and she responded saying she was surprised she still felt good.  When she was about 3/4 of the way up she looked up and yelled, "I'm doing it, I can't believe it."  She started to cry with happiness and I tried not to cry as I responded, "I know, you are doing so well!"  I went down and walked the rest of the way up with her.  As we reached the peak she stood there for several moments reveling in the wonder of what had just been accomplished.  The confirmation that the doctors don't have all of the answers, that she is not crazy to rely on her God who promised her a healing, that she was able to do the unthinkable because He gave her strength to do it.  Such an amazing moment in time and I was able to bear witness to it... 

     To give you some element of perspective: imagine if you decided right now to run a marathon.  26+ miles right now without any training, now imagine you actually completed that marathon and successfully crossed the finish line running.  That's what climbing that sand dune was like.  Asking an averagely fit person to run 26+miles with no break and do so successfully.

     One weekend...four miracles.  Straight up, out of the blue, inexplicable miracles.  It is not for me to make you believe, it is only for me to share with you what I know.  I know that my life is blessed daily by the constant presence of my Lord and Savior.  I know that I am given gifts beyond measure to help me along life's troubled way.  And finally, I know without a doubt that if you stop and honestly ask Him to show you the truth of these words right now...He will do it.  That is what I know, that is the legacy I want to leave with you.  Amen.