Matthew 14:25-31
In English the definition of crisis is: a time of intense difficulty, trouble or danger. But in Chinese the word for crisis is wei-ji (or chi). Wei meaning 'danger' and ji (chi) meaning 'crucial/critical point'. I love the Chinese definition because it is not simply a moment fraught with fear and danger, it also holds the potential for growth and change. If one is at a dangerous critical point it implies they have a decision to make and that decision may fundamentally change their future. So a moment of crisis becomes a moment of opportunity. It still possesses potential for failure and loss but maintains a hope of something better to come.
I have been considering this word crisis in relation to one's spiritual life. There is a tendency to see a 'crisis of faith' as the worst possible thing that could happen to someone. As if when faced with such a crisis the person is doomed to utter loss and ultimate failure if those who are of strong faith don't forcibly pull them into safety. I would argue that thought process is believed to be based in love, but is truly based in fear.
In my minds eye I see the iconic image of a fishing vessel tossed about on the waves of a great sea by an endless storm. Inside of the boat is safety and security and outside of it is what appears to be certain death. The majority watch the storm, looking to help pull to safety anyone who is trapped in the merciless waters below, but a few look out and wonder, "Is the storm truly that bad?". Perhaps someone, whether drawn away and blinded by their own desires or called to accomplish something the others cannot yet see or understand, steps out of the safety of the vessel into the wildness of the crashing waves. Out of love and concern those still within the ship call out, cry, beg and grasp for their loved one...afraid they will never be seen again. Afraid they should have done more, should have seen them walking to the edge and given warning sooner. Perhaps they have been calling and holding on for awhile, to no avail.
I wonder when Peter walked to the edge of the ship...what were those with him thinking? Were they confident with the knowledge that Christ was in power and would keep Peter above the waves or were they thinking and telling him he was crazy and should never step out into certain death? Did they warn him to stay in the safety of the ship or encourage him to follow their Savior? He asked The Lord for something greater and was given a calling that required all of his focus and faith to accomplish. It required him seeing and believing in something greater than the security of what he understood as safe and best. He was in a moment of a great 'crisis of faith' and he had to make a choice. On the one hand his current level of faith and understanding and on the other hand the potential for death or spiritual growth that would fundamentally change the course of his life.
Peter did not walk on water, he stepped out and was instantly overcome by the strength of the storm surrounding him. In fear his faith wavered and he began to sink into the depths of the sea. What were the thoughts of his brothers still in the boat I wonder....I can imagine what my thoughts would be. A combination of terror for his safety and smugness in knowing I was right that it could not be accomplished and he should have stayed where he belonged.
The thing is...even though Peter immediately 'missed the mark' (side note: the word sin in Hebrew means to miss the mark) and began to sink, he also knew who to turn to for help. He cried to his Savior to lift him up and save him. Immediately Christ was at his side raising him from certain death. Here's the kicker, after bringing him up out of the sea Jesus did not chide Peter for asking to step into the storm and walk on water. He only chided Peter for failing to believe He had all power over that which could destroy him. He didn't say, "Peter you idiot why would you ever think you could ever step out of that boat and overcome the wind and waves, you are not the Son of God." instead he said, "Peter why would you doubt my power to hold you up in the midst of this storm?". He wasn't upset that Peter had a 'crisis of faith' he was upset that Peter did not trust Him during that crisis.
I know there are many of you who are or will be going through your own 'crisis of faith'. I have mine just as you have yours. I cannot decide for you and get you through them any more than you can for me. What I can do is assure you of what I believe is true. Your Heavenly Father is not afraid of your questions, nor your 'crisis of faith' in fact, I believe, He welcomes the opportunity to help you grow stronger through them. As long as you are asking His direction through them He will show you when and where is the right time to step out in faith. As long as you know to call out to Him for salvation when you miss the mark, He will lift you out of the waves threatening to cover you. He does not expect you to remain in stagnant safety and security forever, He expects you to seek His guidance and believe that He has all power to hold you above the storm.
